This essay is from Ben Kreps and the video linked HERE is a discussion of the topic.
Our current cultural moment insists that our subjective feelings of happiness should guide even the most significant spheres of life—marriage, work, and familial relationships, to name just a few. Building your life on the shifting sand of a slippery, subjective internal experience is a path to disaster, yet so many people have been convinced by this error.
Happiness is overrated. Hear me out—our emotions are a gift from God and bring richness and color to our lives, but personal feelings make for a terrible master. When we make happiness the sun around which our lives orbit, we are left vulnerable to all manner of confusion and a distorted perspective.
I’m not criticizing emotions; I am, however, concerned with ‘emotionalism,’ or the tendency to base our beliefs and decisions on feelings rather than on objective truth.
Are your parents troubling you with their political beliefs? Cut them out of your life. Is your marriage unfulfilling to you? Get a divorce and pursue someone else who will make you happy. Is your unwanted pregnancy complicating the goals you have for your life? You get the idea…
The Bible, of course, is the source of objective truth that informs every area of our lives, including our emotional life.
The truth is that God often does His greatest work in our lives through experiences we would not necessarily choose for ourselves. His Fatherly discipline isn’t what we would call a pleasant experience. At times He employs painful trials for our growth and maturity. But if we are intent on chasing the ephemeral experience of happiness to guide our steps, we will fail to experience all of the goodness and grace that God has for our lives.
God’s Word also gives us direction to shape our emotional lives.
We are exhorted repeatedly to pursue joy in God. We are called to intentionally cultivate a grateful heart. We are invited to a life of enjoying God’s good gifts and, most importantly, finding peace and satisfaction in the Lord Jesus. We are not called to stoicism or to imitate Mr. Spock from Star Trek; a rich and godly emotional life is ours by the grace of God.
Augustine once wrote, “give what you command, and command what you will.” God commands us in the area of our emotions and then gives us all the grace that we need to experience an imperfect but healthy inner life for His glory and our good.
Though we will have sorrow in this world, we can truly know something of that divine happiness that is out of reach of any and all of our enemies. As our Statement of Faith says, “the gospel enables us to rejoice in the midst of tribulations, assured that his purposes are working for our good even in circumstances we do not understand.”
3 Ways To Cultivate A Godly Emotional Life
1. Take Responsibility For Your Emotions
While we will experience emotions that arrive unbidden, by God’s grace we can resist things like sinful anger or anxiety. We are not to excuse our sin because “they made me angry,” or “I was upset.” When we inevitably sin, we confess and forsake our sin and are promised that God “is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness” by the blood of Jesus shed at Calvary.
2. Spend Unhurried Time In God’s Word Informing Your Emotions
Psalm 119 reveals the heart of a man who spends unhurried time with God, enjoying Him as he meditates upon His Word. Our Bible reading should not be one more thing to check off our to-do list; it is God speaking to us and drawing near by His Spirit as we engage with Him in His self-revelation. It should shape everything about us, including our emotions.
Charles Bridges writes, “Many, indeed, are satisfied with far too low a standard of spiritual enjoyments. It is comfortless to live at a distance from our Father’s house, when we might be dwelling in the secret of his presence, and rejoicing in the smiles of his love.”
3. Live With An Eternity In View That Provides an Anchor for Our Emotions
Our Statement of Faith says: “Fixing our eyes on Jesus, we endure in faith and abound in hope, confident that a day is fast approaching when sin and sorrow will be no more.” What unshakable joy we have in knowing that King Jesus is returning! Every tear will be wiped from our eyes, and we will know fullness of joy forever at His side. When we cultivate anticipation and expectation for Jesus’ return, we get to abound in hope and rejoice in knowing that our eternal joy is certain and secure.
ABOUT
Ricky Alcantar serves as Pastor at Cross of Grace Church in El Paso, Texas and the Editorial Director for Digital with Sovereign Grace Churches.
Ben Kreps serves as pastor at Living Hope Church in Middletown, Pennsylvania and also hosts the Mark Prater podcast.